Fahrvergnügen Deprivation
I can't get no....fahrvergnügen....
And I've given up trying.
Remember the days when people would go out for a drive?
Just to drive. And see "stuff". Is it just me, or are those
days gone forever?
Gas cost about 37 cents per gallon back then, I think.
Maybe now it's too expensive to just drive around aimlessly.
But never mind the cost - it's hard to enjoy driving anywhere
when you have the "brake slammer" in front of you. You know
those types....there's nothing in front of them, but they constantly
step on the brake. Why????
Then there are the people on the highway who have some perverse
fascination with "being first". No matter what speed YOU go,
they have to get in front of you. First they tail-gate to try to
intimidate you, then they blow by you to "make a statement",
even if you're in traffic and they're not going anywhere anyhow.
Where I live, I can't go anywhere without finding a traffic jam.
I often think that somewhere, up at the front of the pack, are
people who've been hired to slow things down by driving
ridiculously slow (or by crashing into something). Maybe
this is just a state-sponsored programme to get us all to
slow down.
Bends in the road seem to scare people. If there's a curve on
the highway you can't see around, the ONLY thing to do is
slam on your brakes and slow to a crawl - because who knows,
there might be a thousand-foot drop ahead....it could happen.
Same thing with hills - maybe it just falls off at the top....better
take it at a snail's pace.
I think one problem is that are just too many cars. But I have a
solution: I'd like to become a gov't-appointed officer whose
only job is to pull over drivers who act like idiots.
I'd inform them they are too stupid to operate a heavy
metal object at high speeds, take their license away and
that's the end of it. Start walking. Let's thin the herd.
However, this system will only work if *I* am the sole officer
with enforcement power. We don't want to take any chances
on how the definition of "infraction" is interpreted. Don't worry,
I'm willing to travel!
And I've given up trying.
Remember the days when people would go out for a drive?
Just to drive. And see "stuff". Is it just me, or are those
days gone forever?
Gas cost about 37 cents per gallon back then, I think.
Maybe now it's too expensive to just drive around aimlessly.
But never mind the cost - it's hard to enjoy driving anywhere
when you have the "brake slammer" in front of you. You know
those types....there's nothing in front of them, but they constantly
step on the brake. Why????
Then there are the people on the highway who have some perverse
fascination with "being first". No matter what speed YOU go,
they have to get in front of you. First they tail-gate to try to
intimidate you, then they blow by you to "make a statement",
even if you're in traffic and they're not going anywhere anyhow.
Where I live, I can't go anywhere without finding a traffic jam.
I often think that somewhere, up at the front of the pack, are
people who've been hired to slow things down by driving
ridiculously slow (or by crashing into something). Maybe
this is just a state-sponsored programme to get us all to
slow down.
Bends in the road seem to scare people. If there's a curve on
the highway you can't see around, the ONLY thing to do is
slam on your brakes and slow to a crawl - because who knows,
there might be a thousand-foot drop ahead....it could happen.
Same thing with hills - maybe it just falls off at the top....better
take it at a snail's pace.
I think one problem is that are just too many cars. But I have a
solution: I'd like to become a gov't-appointed officer whose
only job is to pull over drivers who act like idiots.
I'd inform them they are too stupid to operate a heavy
metal object at high speeds, take their license away and
that's the end of it. Start walking. Let's thin the herd.
However, this system will only work if *I* am the sole officer
with enforcement power. We don't want to take any chances
on how the definition of "infraction" is interpreted. Don't worry,
I'm willing to travel!
posted by Mr. L at 1:20 PM
2 Comments:
ha! i live in the middle of NOWHERE with hardly any traffic and can STILL relate to what you are saying!! after years of living in l.a. it's still a relief, but there are no joyrides these days. not only the price of gas, but the price of tires that wear out every 25000 miles on curvy roads. not to mention brake repair for constant slamming on the brakes for the deer in the road.
Why don't those damned deer stand on long straight roads instead of the curvy ones?? I've only seen one deer around here in the last five years. It wandered through my yard and then down onto the highway. Deer + Highway...bad combo. We crossed our fingers, hoping we wouldn't see a traffic jam soon...
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