Another Alternative
With the high cost of energy these days, we keep hearing about the
need for "alternative sources". Trouble is, it's always the same:
solar (which will never happen unless we allow the energy
industry to put lead boxes over our houses if we don't pay
"the sun bill"), or wind (same deal, but I don't know what they'd
have to do....build walls everywhere?).
Here's one I never hear about, though I don't know why: COWS.
We've certainly got enough of them. I think, in a state or two, there
are more cows than humans.
How can cows help?
Well, they certainly produce enough methane, but I think sheep
have the lead in that regard. Cows produce enough manure. We
already use that. But, no, the answer is milk.
At least in my area, milk costs roughly the same as gasoline. So,
someone needs to find a way to use milk for fuel. I would think
the price might even come down if EVERY dairy farmer had a
guaranteed market....at least until Halliburton gets into the
milking business. Milking COWS, I mean.
Do you think we'd need to rely on foreign imports for milk?
Would the energy industry still have the "need" to clear-cut
the state of Alaska?
I suppose you'd have the choice of 1%, 2%, or whole at the pump.
Of course, 1% would probably be the most expensive because
it would require "more refining".
Another point is: how many times have you come home with
a new gallon of milk, only to find that it won't fit in the
fridge? Fine, you say....I'll just have 'the last glass' from
this carton and then put the new one in. You pour the
glass....there's still milk in the old container. You drink
half the glass and refill it....there's still milk in old
container!! It just WON'T run out! If we could get that
deal with fuel, we'd be golden -- you'd keep trying to put
new gas in your car, but it would always be 'too full'...!!!
Anyway, I think it's time to put all of those cows to work for
us. All they do is stand around all day glaring at passersby.
Even the fake cow out on Route 1 in Massachusetts has
been staring at me ominously for over 20 years.
Very unproductive behaviour.
Let's drain them dry.
"You can jump all you want, but ownership of the planet soon
reverts to the cow."
-- Mike Keneally, "Day of the Cow"
need for "alternative sources". Trouble is, it's always the same:
solar (which will never happen unless we allow the energy
industry to put lead boxes over our houses if we don't pay
"the sun bill"), or wind (same deal, but I don't know what they'd
have to do....build walls everywhere?).
Here's one I never hear about, though I don't know why: COWS.
We've certainly got enough of them. I think, in a state or two, there
are more cows than humans.
How can cows help?
Well, they certainly produce enough methane, but I think sheep
have the lead in that regard. Cows produce enough manure. We
already use that. But, no, the answer is milk.
At least in my area, milk costs roughly the same as gasoline. So,
someone needs to find a way to use milk for fuel. I would think
the price might even come down if EVERY dairy farmer had a
guaranteed market....at least until Halliburton gets into the
milking business. Milking COWS, I mean.
Do you think we'd need to rely on foreign imports for milk?
Would the energy industry still have the "need" to clear-cut
the state of Alaska?
I suppose you'd have the choice of 1%, 2%, or whole at the pump.
Of course, 1% would probably be the most expensive because
it would require "more refining".
Another point is: how many times have you come home with
a new gallon of milk, only to find that it won't fit in the
fridge? Fine, you say....I'll just have 'the last glass' from
this carton and then put the new one in. You pour the
glass....there's still milk in the old container. You drink
half the glass and refill it....there's still milk in old
container!! It just WON'T run out! If we could get that
deal with fuel, we'd be golden -- you'd keep trying to put
new gas in your car, but it would always be 'too full'...!!!
Anyway, I think it's time to put all of those cows to work for
us. All they do is stand around all day glaring at passersby.
Even the fake cow out on Route 1 in Massachusetts has
been staring at me ominously for over 20 years.
Very unproductive behaviour.
Let's drain them dry.
"You can jump all you want, but ownership of the planet soon
reverts to the cow."
-- Mike Keneally, "Day of the Cow"
posted by Mr. L at 5:17 PM
5 Comments:
You forgot skim....
got milk?
Who says Halliburton doesn't already control the price of milk? There ought to be a way to mix the methane with the milk and power up a little car whose exhaust would smell like cutting the cheese.
How about Goat's MILK?
did you ever see the episode of the simpsons where the school kept rats in cages and fed the kids rats milk for lunch? this post remindedme of that sometime in the middle of the night.
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