Sucking in the 00s

My wife is convinced I have a problem.

It all started when we bought a red area rug that
really shows the dust on the floor. I started
running the vacuum every day just to keep the
rug looking presentable. But then I discovered
something: vacuuming all the time helped my
allergy problem A LOT - which only encouraged
me to do it more.

Then my wife started making suggestions that
perhaps my relationship with the vacuum was more
of an "affair" . . . well, alright, then. I've started to do it
when she isn't home. If she walks in on me, she gives
me "the look". At least I haven't named the machine.
Yet.

There's nothing wrong with what I'm doing.
She just doesn't understand us. Yeah, that's it.

(Did I mention the special attachments?? Um . . .
never mind . . . )